Crop Over 2017: Booze Cruise: Tiny Bubbles Review

Fete Rating (On a scale of 1-5):

2.5

It hurts my heart to give Booze Cruise: Tiny Bubbles this rating but this year’s event fell short in a number of ways. It had absolutely nothing to do with torrential downpour that preceded the event. The bulk of my frustration came from my high expectations, their poor communication and my hunger. This fete was spoken so highly by all my friends and many of them agreed that it wasn’t the best year.

The cruise was scheduled to depart at 10am but the rain delayed this departure. Nothing they can do about that. However, it was over an hour into waiting before an announcement was finally made about the anticipated departure time for the boat once the weather cleared up. After that, no more announcements were made. As a result, we almost missed the boat since no one announced that the boat was boarding. The scolding by the staff about taking my “sweet time” to board the vessel didn’t make matters any better. We had fun and made the best of the fete as any person would do. However, I would think twice or even three times before spending $125 for this fete again.

Venue: Booze Cruise: Tiny Bubbles was held on the Harbor Master and boarded on the beach itself and not from a dock like most boat rides. Because of this, you had to remove your shoes and go through the water to get onto the boat. Talk about a fete entrance right? It’s cool in theory but in actuality, it’s a pain in the you-know-what. When I got on the boat, my feet were wet (obviously). However, there were no towels to dry my feet or bottles of water to rinse my feet from the residual sand that I walked through when getting onto the boat. The first 15 minutes on the boat was used to rinse my feet with water from the bar while using most of the bar napkins to dry my feet before putting my shoes back on. All this work and I haven’t had a drink or pelt any kind of waist yet!

Bar: This fete was an all-inclusive so all the drinks were included in the ticket price. Because of the late departure, most people jumped into the food line first. This meant that the bar was a breeze to get to. I ended up eating on shore (more on that below) so I skipped the food line and drank my weight in Johnnie Walker and champagne. This was the best part of Booze Cruise: Tiny Bubbles – easy access to the bar. Thank you Jesus!

Food: This is the part that had me extra hot but I take responsibility for my part in not being better prepared. Because I make a living writing about food and travel, I always look forward to the food at any all-inclusive. Due to the late start, I started getting hungry on shore. Let’s rephrase that – I became hangry and couldn’t wait to board the boat to eat. Because I hadn’t eaten anything before getting to the fete (my fault), I had to buy something on shore to help me return to my normal self. I figured I’d get something extra on the boat to help set me up for a successful day of extensive drinking. Oh, how I was wrong. Long story short, the line for the food was ridiculously long. It got so bad that they had to shut down the food distribution since people couldn’t act right in the line. Le sigh… there are so many ways to make the food distribution process a smooth one. Logistics are key to the success of any event.

Music: The other saving grace for this fete! Between Patrick the Hypeman and Lil’ Rick’s live performance, the music on Booze Cruise was bessss!

Ultimate Fete Factor (UFF): Booze Cruise’s UFF is their boarding process. Accessing the boat from the beach rather than from a dock is unlike any other boat ride I’ve experienced. While I didn’t like it per se, it is the thing that makes them stand out from any other fete I’ve been to.